Are We Truly Forgiving?

* Matt. 18:21-35; “Then came Peter to him, and said, Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? Till seven times? Jesus saith unto him, I say unto not unto thee, until seven times: but, until seventy times seven. Therefore is the kingdom of heaven likened unto a certain king, which would take account of his servants. And when he had begun to reckon, one was brought unto him, which owed him ten thousand talents. But forasmuch as he had not to pay, his Lord commanded him to be sold, and his wife and children, and all that he had, and payment to be made. The servant therefore fell down and worshipped him, saying, Lord, have patience with me, and I will pay thee all. Then the Lord of that servant was moved with compassion, and loosed him, and forgave him all his debt. But the same servant went out and found one of his fellow servants, which owed him an hundred pence: and he laid hands on him, and take him by the throat, saying, Pay me what thou owest. And his fellow servant fell down at his feet, and besought him, saying, Have patience with me, and I will pay thee all. And he would not: but he went and cast him into prison, till he should pay the debt. So when his fellow servants saw what was done, they were very sorry, and came and told unto their lord all that was done. Then his lord, after that he had called him, said unto him, Oh thou wicked servant, I forgave thee all that debt, because thou desiredst me: Shouldest not thou also have had compassion on thy fellow servant, even as I had pity on thee? And his lord was wroth, and delivered him to the tormentors, till he should pay all that was due him. So likewise shall my heavenly Father do also unto you, if ye from your hearts forgive not every one his brother their trespasses.”

Are we truly forgiving?

Do we treats others the way God would have us to, or is it just lip service? God has been dealing with me lately about true forgiveness. So I am going to share with you what He has been showing me.
Now I know some of you are saying, “What! Me…forgive him? But, Leigh, you don’t know what I’ve been through. Why, just yesterday he___________________. How can I possibly forgive him for all of that!!!”
And yet this is exactly what we need to do to be healed of the pain we have suffered and released from the bonds of slavery that have chained us in this valley of despair we have resided in for so long. I long to break free! Don’t you?

Forgiveness isn’t for the person, or persons, who have wronged us. Oh it is important that they know they are forgivable, by us and by God. But, it is for our spiritual growth that we must learn to forgive. For we must be willing to drop our baggage at the side of the road before we can begin our journey into the heights with Jesus. So have faith in Him, cut your anchor chain and watch where He will lead you as you learn to trust Jesus and follow Him upon the mountains, up to the high places.

Jesus is our example of how we are to forgive. While He was dying on the Cross He uttered this famous prayer; "…Father forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing…" Luke 23:34 NIV

By this He was forgiving the Jewish leaders, the Roman government, soldiers, and the people caught up in the crowd watching. By this He brought salvation to all men, including those who murdered Him. By this He also forgave us before we were even a thought in our parents hearts. We, too, are sinners guilty of putting Him to death.

If you were the only person created by the Master, He still would have chosen to die in your place on Calvary. To endure every pain He felt in His body and in His spirit as a result of your sin and separation from Him, and in His death, His separation from God. And He still would have chosen to forgive you all you sins.

Forgiveness, like love, is a choice. It is an action and we have a part in that action. We must lay aside our hurt and pain to allow God to bring us through them. It is a very slow process and you won’t “feel” like forgiving at first. But we have to start with a choice.

Our choice needs to be followed quickly by our words; thought, spoken and written. I remember when I started homeschooling my children. My son had the hardest time learning many things. But we had a county teacher who came once a month to check our progress. I shared with him the struggles we were having. He told me something I have never forgotten. “Learning,” he said, “is done differently by each person. Some can read a process one time and can do it almost instantly. Others need to involve more sections of their brain to truly grasp many simple concepts. So use as many of the five senses as possible to assist in the learning process.” As we are “learning” forgiveness we will need to see, speak, hear and feel – by writing – this process of learning to forgive.

While making the choice to forgive, mentally add names, and faces, to this choice to make it more real in your heart. Speak your list to Jesus – OUT LOUD. Write the details of the hurts and pain experienced, and that you have made a choice to be forgiving to all those people for ALL the things you have suffered. And don’t forget to add your name to your list. Yes, your name. Believe it or not, you are harboring guilt and unforgiveness against yourself for allowing others to hurt you. Your choices may not make an immediate change within you. It will have to be repeated often; daily, sometimes moment-by-moment.

* Matt. 6:12-15 in the NIV says: "…Forgive us our debts, as we also forgive our debtors. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from the evil one. For if you forgive men when they sin against you, you’re heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their sins, your heavenly Father will not forgive your sins."

God gives us the choice to forgive. But, if we choose not to forgive, He in turn chooses not to forgive us. Our unforgiveness comes with a very heavy penalty. We can't scale the heights with Jesus, or enter into His Holiest of Holies, the very throne room of the fullness of God's presence. We would be stagnant in our spiritual liven not filled with the springs of living water. The abundant live He has promised us.


* Matt. 5:23-24 KJV says: "Therefore if thou bring thy gift to the altar. and there rememberest that thy brother has aught against thee; leave thy gift before the altar, and go thy way; first be reconciled to thy brother, and then come and offer thy gift."

The NIV says it this way: ''Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to your brother, then come and offer your gift. ''

The Lord says if we think that our brother is holding something against us, we are to go to that brother and work things out before we offer our gift to God. Our gifts to God are our purity of heart and thoughts.

* Matt 5:8 says; "Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God."

It is also our worship and praise, which draws us into the very presence of God. I feel this place of praise and worship allows us to “see God” here on earth before we get to see Him face to face. But, if we can 't give Him our gifts, how can He dwell fully in our beings, ... in our very hearts? For God inhabits, He lives inside, the praises of His people.

Forgiveness is the very basis of our salvation. Without God's forgiveness we too would be outside of the kingdom. Zechariah prophesied of John the Baptist in Luke 1:76, 77

* In the NIV it reads: "And you, my child, will be called the prophet of the Most High; for you will go before the Lord to prepare the way for Him, to give His people the knowledge of salvation through the forgiveness of their sins.''

He was telling his family and friends that salvation would come through God's forgiveness and that John would lead the way to Jesus, who would bring that forgiveness. So if salvation is through forgiveness, and we are to follow Christ's example, how can we not forgive? It is a must!

Now that we have made the choice to forgive and used most of our senses to confirm our choice, it is time to put actions to our choice, and to our words. Saying "I forgive you, '' isn't enough. We must follow through with the actions and attitudes of heart that agree with our words. We must act toward that person – or persons – as if forgiveness is in full bloom in our hearts. Our feelings may be calling us “liar” or “hypocrite.” But our feelings are wrong. They are Satan’s tools to sabotage our choice to forgive, to keep us distracted and in bondage to our fears, hurts and pain. Our the actions will show that we are serious in our forgiveness, even if our "feelings'' aren't in agreement. If we trust God and walk out our acts of forgiveness, our feelings will follow. Then we will be in complete agreement; body, soul and spirit, in our forgiveness.

Let us remember that in our forgiveness we are NOT required to go back and submit again to the things that have hurt us in the past. But we are called to reconciliation. It is a time of solidifying the forgiveness that started in our hearts as a choice. Forgiveness and the subsequent reconciliation are designed to give us freedom to worship God in wholeness, causing us to grow in our faith in God. And to be released from the baggage we have carried around with us for so long; cuddling, and hugging because they were so familiar and “felt safe.” Forgiveness doesn't mean everything that has been done to us is OK and can be done to us all over again, or that we are not to put ourselves back into bondage to the person or persons who have hurt us. It is to lighten our load and allow us to leave our burdens at Jesus' feet. That is where they belong, anyway. Picking up that hurt and pain day after day is not only choosing to hurt ourselves again and again. And it is hindering our walk with God. We can't grow in our faith if we are all filled up with unforgiveness, hurt, and pain. There is no room left in our hearts for more of the Holy Spirit.

I've been working on letting go of the unforgiveness, hurt and pain in my life. I’ve been praying for the people in my past who have been a part of causing it. Asking God to teach them the truth and the way of salvation. And praying for blessings on them and their families. This has released me from the bondage of carrying around all that hate and bitterness. I actually feel a lot lighter of spirit, clearer of mind and not so tied up in knots throughout my body. It isn’t easy and doesn’t happen overnight. Satan will be standing right around the corner waiting to trip you up in this new choice you have made. So build landmarks; tangible mile markers as evidence to hold onto and be able to look back at to remember the promises of God and the progress you have made. Keeping a journal is one way to mark our progress. Jotting down your thoughts and prayers, or a bit of poetry & verse given by God’s inspiration. Or writing in the margins of your Bible beside verses He gives to encourage and lift you up.

* Isa 53:5, 6 says; "But, He was wounded for our transgressions, He was bruised for our iniquities: the chastisement of our peace was upon Him; and by His stripes we are healed…and the Lord has laid on Him the iniquities of us all."

If He has done this for us, He has done the same for them, too!

At the onset of this message I quoted a passage from Matt 18 where Peter asks our Lord how many times we are to forgive. In verse 22 he answered, “…I say not unto thee, Until seven times: but, Until seventy times seven.” Sometimes it will take seventy times seven. But, if we can learn to forgive 70x7 (490 times) then why not 491, or 492, or even 1000. This is the whole point Jesus was making.

Satan will try to goad us into renouncing our new commitment to learning true forgiveness. Be strong! And let’s stand by our choice to learn forgiveness. Pray often calling upon the name of Jesus in the tough times. Psalm 118:14 says; "The Lord is my strength and my song, and is become my salvation."

It is the beginning, of a new year. And we are in the month traditionally focused on loving others. Let's love them and ourselves, as well. Lets let go of whatever is hindering our spirits. If it is hate, hurt, pain, bitterness and/or unforgiveness, lets give it over to God. He will handle it so much better than we do. He forgives perfectly.

* Jesus said in Matt. 11:29, 30: "Take my yoke upon you and learn of me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light."

If we are to pick up His yoke - the load He carries - we must first put ours down. He will pick it up and put it in its proper place, under the Blood. And if we leave it with Him, He will take it far away, as far as the East is from the West. Lets make a new commitment with God to leave our hurt, pain, and unforgiveness at the foot of the Cross, picking up His yoke and His burden and letting Him carry ours.

Join me in making this and each new year a year of learning more of Jesus and His ways. And let us concentrate on TRUE FORGIVENESS as our starting place.

Written originally Feb 2007